23 April 2009

Another Reason to Thank God You're Not Me

In another writing venue, I have sometimes been fond of composing topical haikus. Yes, you thought I was already at the point of maximum irrelevant absurdity, but how wrong you were.

I was thinking that the Catholic world doesn't have enough haiku-ing going on. So, I am here to remedy that sad situation.

Homeschoolers will recall that a haiku is a Japanese poem with three lines, following a pattern of 5-7-5 syllables. Enjoy these, from the deep recesses of my mind.

Until you can name
Nine fruits of the Holy Ghost
Keep reading St. Paul.

No kneeling allowed,
Our pastoral team insists--
We no longer believe.

Never tell Bozek
Catholics don't want Moonies
And you'll get along.

Nattily attired,
Oscar hits Saturday Mass
New flip-flops flapping.

Latin had to go--
Audience now understands
When we should applaud.

Yearning for the past,
Each of the dissenting nuns
Re-reads Karl Rahner.

Xavier's college
Took out the altar, for what?
Old coffee table.

Posted on this blog,
Only troglodyte stories--
Stick with NCR.

Tell no one I'm here
At the Traditional Mass--
Government's watching.

All I need, says Jane,
Is to dig that Orans thing
Now Our Father's here.


Patrick Kinsale said...

Let me guess ... Canon Lawyer X is now the incoming archbishop of St. Louis!

cmziall said...

Unknown Canon Lawyer X To Post Again. . . .hmmm, still not sure what that means, but maybe someone whose brain works better than mine can figure this out. :-p

Beer Baron said...

Don't you have a regular job that pays?

If not, maybe you should be teaching poetry to your homeschooling children and giving your poor, overworked wife a break once in a while. Maybe that's why you have to portray her as an angry woman threatening you with a rolling pin.

I did enjoy the poetry. Here's one for you:

Everyone loves when
Gals cover heads as they pray
On knees so humbly.


thetimman said...

I love that Beer Baron.

HSMom said...

My boys, my students
Some days in class can be tough
Where's the chocolate?

Tad the Trad said...

St. Francis de Sales
Institute of Christ the King
Almost Paradise.

RJSciurus said...

Too much time on hands
Timman writes haiku for you
New Archbishop reads

I believe in God
Father, Son and Holy Ghost
Deo Gratias

Latin Mass is good
Active Participation
In God's Mystery

I need to stop now
Haiku is too addictive
Thanks for all you do

MrsC said...

bead by bead by bead,
sweet scent of the Rosary.
oh my Lord, hear me.

Anonymous said...

Blogger has no life.
Obsesses about what not.
Want to go fishing?