15 February 2017

Mail Bag: Sally Field Edition



One of the best things about blogging is the incredible support I get from all seven readers. And by support, I'm including the wonderful anonymous people who would rather that I die, or develop some dread disease, or shut up through means natural or unnatural.

Some kind readers really want to know if my parents were married when I was born. Others look forward to meeting me juuust at the time the Church, the Mass, and the remnants of Western Civilization are destroyed-- you know, so they can see my face.

If you have read my blog for some years, you know that ordinarily I am defenseless against reverse psychology: anyone who cleverly points out that I won't ever have the nerve to post their wonderful comment (wink, wink) is sure to have it posted.

Some declare delight just knowing that I. Will. Read. This., but never post.

Some are just d*******s. Can I say that on the air?

Far from discouraging me, they keep me going. As one of my many, many daughters might say, "Timmy's loving life!"

And since I'm loving life, I thought I would share just a few of the printable comments I would not normally post, and give their authors a long-sought-for reply. Why? Because everything else is so great these days, I thought I'd be good to these good souls. 

N.B. Spelling and grammar as in the orignal. Enjoy!
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"Many of us are gaining great pleasure in watching you, Burke, Trump, and your coterie of philistines twist in the wind." 

--Anonymous

Dear Jorge, 

As you know, I am quite rigid about the need to affix a name to your comment in order to see it posted. So bear that in mind. However, I like your use of the word coterie, and your concept of schadenfreude. Not sure you know what a philistine is, but hey, two out of three ain't bad.

--thetimman
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Oh, geez. What's next, are you going to put the back of your hand to your forehead, declare that's all just too much, and faint? Your poor dad. Probably thinking "should have named that boy Nancy."

--Jimmy

Dear Jimmy, 

That's all just too much. How did you know my birth name was Nancy?

-- thetimma.....(faints)
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And we should listen to a person who "Reader X could tell stories, no doubt, of the difficulties of getting me to even consider certain facts about the state of things"; So you are open to facts when giving opinions??? I think not, AND this comment will never pass moderation but YOU will see this. The height of ignorance is saying "here's the facts, but people will tell you it's hard to convince me of the facts... what a joke.

--Anonymous

Dear Reader X Anonymous,

I was torn in moderating this comment between enforcing the simple, longstanding rule against posting anonymous comments, and my powerlessness in the face of reverse psychology. As you can see, I really am powerless in the face of reverse psychology. It is nice to hear from about Reader X after his long absence from this space, and I would respond to your comment more fully if I understood it at all. Pax & all the best,

--thetimman
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(This last series of comments requires a brief intro.  "Mary", presumably not Our Blessed Mother, wrote several times taking me to task over President Donald J. Trump.)

It's time for you to just SHUT UP. Most of Congress thinks Obama did the right thing. Anything Obama did would be wrong in your mind. If he mandated Catholicism as the state religion and made the Latin Mass the only form of worship, he'd still be wrong. I know now why you hate Lincoln so much. You are a closet racist (perhaps not so closet). Don't even try to pretend otherwise. Don't try to claim that you support states' rights. I know you won't post this, and I don't care. You just need a mirror held up to your prejudiced face. You're only a step away from calling the Obamas gorillas. Also, since when do people like you admire Communists? Oh, of course, it's when the Communist is a white guy and the President is black. Also, it's Trump who's going to start a war with his ill-considered, self-loving tweet-storming. 

--Mary (12/30/16)

Dear Mary,

You make a lot of really great points. Thanks for writing. King Lincoln was white. Obama was born of one white and one black parent. If either of them mandated Catholicism as the state religion, that would be A-OK. It would be even better if either of them would #AnswerTheDubia.

Can't we all get along?

I think the problem might be one of projection-- you charge me with racism, but you are fixated on rejecting the lawfully elected president on the grounds that he's orange. Don't pretend otherwise. I, on the other hand, will continue to fight for the rights of my orange brothers and sisters in the face of your hostility. 

--thetimman
P.S. Still powerless in the face of reverse psychology.
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It won't be long before Donny boy starts a war with Jina. No president has ever let his mouth run like he does.

--Mary (01/16/17)

Mary, 

Inauguration day was the 20th. You wrote this on the 16th. 

--thetimman
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Oh, yes, let's keep out those scary Canadians. Also, Melania was sleeveless. I guess it's OK because she's not Michelle Obama. You disgust me.

--Mary (01/21/17)

Dear Mary, 

You, on the other hand, fascinate me. Peace and Love,

--thetimman


2 comments:

Jane Chantal said...

How did I miss the sleeves/sleevelessness post? No fair.

Mark Docherty said...

This is gold.