22 February 2008

Taking the Bait

Though Bill McClellan is often entertaining and provides some insightful commentary, columns like this one are the price one pays for having him on staff. I mean, is it too much for a reporter at the largest newspaper in town to actually investigates the dubious "facts" about which he comments?

The straw man this week is homeschooling.

In an article otherwise irrelevant to the topic, our friend Bill writes as follows:

My daughter came home for a visit. She teaches high school biology in California. She believes in evolution. Furthermore, she is not only convinced that the world is more than 6,000 years old, she thinks it's round.

I try not to argue with her. If she wants to be a Democrat, that's up to her.

I had to take her to the airport Thursday morning. Whenever I go to the airport, I think about the round-earth theory.

Many years ago, I flew to what should have been the other side of the globe. Did the airplane ever have to fly upside down? No.

Yet, if you take a globe and then pretend your hand is a plane and move it around to the other side of the globe, your hand ends up upside down. That's not a theory, either. It's a scientific fact.

Had I home-schooled my children, they would understand this. Instead, I sent them to public schools. Still, I try to let them know there are two sides to these issues. In that sense, the drive to the airport represented a teaching moment.

[bulk of the article, concerning lack of traffic on St. Louis streets, in this space. Then...]

Something has happened to the drivers I used to see. They have disappeared. A sizable chunk of our population has simply vanished.

If they had been on the other side of the world, I might believe they had fallen off. But they were on our side of the world. Something else happened.

I believe they have been snatched. But I didn't try to tell my daughter that. I only hinted at it.

"I remember an FBI agent who used to say, 'The truth is out there,'" I said.

"I don't think Fox Mulder was a real FBI agent," she said.

Sometimes I wish I had home-schooled her.


If McClellan is intending the emphasis of his sentence to be, "Had I homeschooled my children, they would understand this", he may have a point. But I expect he means that producing a red-eyed, slack-jawed, scientifically inept, Bible-thumping ignoramus is the inevitable result of homeschooling. See, smart people like his children, you know, Democrats, they know better. Sending his children to public schools is the guarantor of real smartitudiousness.

I will assume that his daughter is at least as bright as this public high school honor student:


Anonymous said...

Duuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. . . .
I like can't even understand what a map is, I mean if we would help the children in Africa, then we'd know maps! Like right? I'm not as smart as Bill McCullen's daughter, but I do know that! Ummmm. . . do you think like I can be Mrs. America, or is it Mrs. from the US of South America?

Anonymous said...

A couple of weeks ago, I flipped by Donnybrook on KETC. [What the hell what I thinking!] All of them--McClellan (what a bum he looks like), Wendy Weiss, Duggan, and Charlie Brennan, all mocked conservative Christians. McClellan also used the lines about the 6000 yr old earth. [That said, however, we Catholics don't believe the creation story as literally as some evangelicals do.] Wendy W said that Huck was to the right of Gengis Kahn (spelling?). Duggan actually asked who these people who were criticizing McCain were deciding who was concervative. Duggan actually knew some nice conservatives. Sigh!

Anonymous said...

This doesn't actually have to do with this post as much as the feed. Every once in awhile you use yellow or white as a font color and it won't show up in the Bloglines reader. Just thought I'd let you know.